Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Guest Blog: Romance, Regret, and Book Gifts

On 7/8/10, I wrote about how my friend "Z" connected a certain author ("A") with a certain time in his life and a certain romantic relationship (with "Y"), because he and "Y" had read "A"'s work together and even met her at an author event. After splitting up with "Y," "Z" no longer read "A"'s work, because of the association. "Z" has now kindly written a guest post with further thoughts and experiences related to connections between certain books and certain romantic relationships (see below). I think you will find the post as intriguing as I do; the intersections of literature, romance, regret, and memory are most evocative. Thanks, "Z"!

From "Z":
"Over the years, amid my growing library are books given to me by past loves and lovers. They all share one thing in common: a note from them on the front-piece or the first page. Some signed off "with all my love," or "love you." Others referred to a shared intimacy or moment. A confession is in order though. Depending on the memories of how these relationships ended, I have done several things to these books. I left several alone because I enjoy reading their sentiments from time to time and recall the exact circumstances of receiving the book. Other books fared less well. The most extreme are the one or two (or three??) I tossed out or sold because I couldn't stand to look at even the book's spine sitting there on one of my shelves, reminding me of love's failures, or rather love's disappointments and regrets. The compromise I reached with the other books was to tear out the page on which the sentiment was written. It wasn't because they were less emotionally connected, but it was simply because I like the book and wanted to keep it, minus the reminder of who had given it to me. However, I remember all gifted books, so the missing page with its sentiments in some ways is all the more present by its absence."
 
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